Nice and long – good
POP-ping your pants
Hold the sausages
Now drink five espressos
Get your message across
But I hate talking to people!
Managing your time effectively
Guh Duh Puh Ruh
It’s closer than you think.
Nod, nod… Wink wink.
Deal with complaints effectively
A load of tat glued together
I think I’m getting dizzy
It’s the pen that’s defective, not me!
He’s literally a customer processing machine!
Oh, no, not you.
Safety is more than warning signs and handrails
When it comes to fire safety in the workplace, we might be tempted to think that it’s not our concern.
Gravity + Complacency = Bad
Taking care of the little things so they can’t come back and bite us later.
We need your precious, fleshy hands and eyes to work without pause, forever.
Human Resource Two is in detention today for chasing a girl with a pooey stick.
DESK BOMB!
Both legs shattered, but don’t worry about it. It’s nothing!
You can control time… and you use it to sell bathroom cleaner??
I am NOT a war criminal!
All that pain is out there waiting for you! So good luck!
But it’s not against the law, technically?
All the thinking has clogged up my brain pipe
I now rule over you all from the fourth floor
Three against one, you don’t stand a chance
GET ANGRY!
Clean up on aisle three please!
Give people confidence in the value of their job.
I’ll give him a ‘personal issue’!
I didn’t want a sandwich!!
You think you’ve got problems?!
What are you going to do about it?
Let’s dig over the past
Improving staff performance
I’m too busy, you know… performing!?
Know your facts
Praise be!
Diagnosis Performance
How to handle a difficult review
Bury it with all the other projects we don’t talk about
Yes to the action, no to the plan
What has change ever done for us?
Colours are a fad…they won’t catch on
I told you punching it would work
You! Do this! Yesterday!
Ten seconds flat. Make mine an egg and cress.
What do you mean by “pointy end”?
I think you’re a dead horse, but Grace wants to keep flogging you.
Keep calm and carry on.
That’s what you said the last two times I told you.
I’ve got to go see the git who sells me things
I’m just not hearing you.
Are you saying there’s pork in these pants?
You may as well put up a sign saying ‘no foreigners’!
Mental, isn’t it!
But… it’s just banter!
You think I’m good at maths because I look Chinese?
Tony to baggage reclaim
I think your positive policy may be having a negative effect on us all.
We’d like to opt-out of the cloning programme!
Sunshine and positivity right up till midday.
Chief fungineer at your service!
Harness the amazing benefits of my seven step Productivity Power Play Package!
Managing your time effectively
Like hell I am!
Train time is game time
I don’t have time for this
Beat stress with burgers?
Running around in circles
